T H E H U M O R L I S T
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Pick Up Lines

1) Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you
right here!

2) Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go screw.

3) Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

4) I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock

5) I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you

6) I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to
it

7) If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous

8) I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have
you seen one?

9) I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Walmart, so I could ride you all
day long for a quarter

10) Wanna Play House? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all
night long

11) If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the
afternoon

12) Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag

13) If you were a car, I'd wax you and ride you all over town

14) Guy: "Would you like to dance?"
Girl: "I don't care for this song and surely wouldn't dance with you"
Guy: "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in
those pants"

15) I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house

16) If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg Christmas, could I
visit you between the Holidays?

17) You look like a girl that has heard every line in the book, so what's one
more going to hurt?

18) F**k me if I'm wrong, but is your name Yolanda?

19) Excuse me, do you wanna f**k, or should I apologize?

20) You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light
switch away

21) Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?

22) Hi my name is _______, remember it, cause you'll be screaming it all night
long

23) Was your dad a farmer? Cause you sure have great melons

24) WEST VIRGINIA PICK UP LINE: The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means
that there's more room for your tongue